Night Terrors?

So, I will be posting about the most amazing wedding ever very shortly, but first I need some advice! I think Ava is having night terrors. It has only started recently, and they happen every once in a while. She "wakes up" flailing, crying, and screaming bloody murder, as if she is hurt or something. I have tried to wake her, comfort her, and make them stop, but all efforts are futile.
Now, I sleep walk and wake up screaming at least a couple times a week, and I have since I was younger, but it is so sad to see an eleven month old doing the same. Does anyone have experience with toddlers and night terrors? How do I prevent them, what do I do when she is having them?

Another Precious Child is in Heaven

I hate that this post is the reason I am writing on this blog today. I SHOULD be writing every day about the accomplishments of my beautiful rainbow baby. I should be keeping up with this blog more....but then something so heartbreaking hits me out of no where, and my fingers want to type...want to trickle the pain through the keys on my laptop and write it all out on this sacred space.

My family has gone through yet another tragedy. One of my cousins (not to be named for privacy reasons...and good luck guessing, I have over 50 cousins!!) Has suffered the most unimaginable loss a mother can endure. She gave birth to a precious baby who had already went to heaven. 

When you go through a loss like this, all you ever pray is that no one close to you ever has to endure the same pain. It stinks when any baby dies, but most of the women I know I met AFTER their babies died, not before. I never got to know who they were BEFORE their lives changed forever. I became part of their lives after that life altering day. I always say "There was the Erin before April 20th 2010, and there is the Erin after...and they are two VERY different people." And I met the "after women". But in this case, I knew the before....and am all too aware of the journey she and her family are about to embark on. The roller coaster ride known by the name "grief". The questions, the guilt, the pain...and I would NEVER EVER EVER wish this upon my worst enemy.....so the fact that it has happened to a family member......I have no words.

The Erin after April 20th, 2010 isn't naive and blissful anymore, I know babies can die now. The Erin after does not judge rude, stand-offish people, because now I realize I never know what they have endured in the last 24 hours. I live each moment as if it is my last, and never take one minute for granted with my beautiful daughter Ava. The Erin "after" still feels a pain in her heart that will never go away...a crippling, sharp pain, that although has gotten easier to bear with time, is still a constant companion. My first thoughts when I see or hear of a new pregnancy is STILL "don't get too comfortable, ANYTHING can happen".....horrible, I know, but an uncontrollable thought that creeps in without my control.

I cannot BELIEVE it has happened to my family again. I cannot believe that they are about to meet their "After September 6th" selves. All I want to do is wrap them in my arms, and take this pain away from them....but alas, as we all know, no one but God can do that. I please ask that you all pray for my family. Pray for my cousin...that her heart is filled with a peace that surpasses all understanding. That God wraps them all in his arms and takes some of the pain away...or at least shares in their pain with them. 

And for you my dear cousin:

You have supported and loved me through the last 2.5 years. Although miles apart, your words of encouragement and prayers have not gone unnoticed. Please know that I am here for you when YOU are ready to talk. I will listen. I love you, and my prayers are with you.

Updates and Pictures

I feel like an awful mother and a BAD blogger! I rely on this blog to help me document the goings on in my life, and to help me remember and reminisce about my life events...and now Ava's life events. However, time seems to go at rocket speeds now a days, and suddenly it has been MONTHS since i have blogged instead of just days or weeks.

You know it is REALLY bad when I started looking through photo files, and I have photos that haven't been edited and converted of Ava since she was 4 months old...for the record, she will be 9 months in 4 days!

So last night I started going through some photos, editing and posting some to facebook.

We have been up to ALOT, but at the same time, up to a whole lot of nothing.

Foster, Avaleen and I have been to the great state of Missouri, hung out with Aunt Chris and Uncle Mike the GREATS, spent some fun times on the farm, and staying busy with work.

I know, I know..i am supposed to be a stay at home mom, but in reality, my job takes more time then most full time, regular jobs. But I LOVE what I do!! Irish Eyes Photography is taking off faster than I had ever dreamed of. I am so blessed to be able to do what I love, and help others preserve their memories!

I will be in Texas (Dallas/FW area) for a week from July 29-Aug 4th...if anyone is interested in family sessions, is expecting a baby around that time, etc, let me know! We can set up a time for a session!!

Here are ALOT of photos of Ava...lol....as she is growing SOOOO big!!

Always so happy....laughing at granny here:-)

The pups are always so protective of her!

She likes to hang out in the sun from the window...like a cat...lol

Aunt Bug taught her how to spit...I caught it on camera;-)

Hanging out with her future husband!

This is the first time she held her bottle by herself (about 5 months old)

First MLB game!!

One of my fav photos!

probably my fav photo of all time:-)

SUCH a daddy's girl!!

Riding tractors like Granny already!!!

She is a water baby!! :-)

Another Rainbow on the Way

When I first started this journey, it was because I was in need of a MAJOR creative outlet after the devestating loss of my first born daughter, Rosalynn. I needed something that made me happy, and encouraged me to get out of the house. Work was work, and unfortunately, there were days I was constantly reminded of my loss with the frequent visits from pregnant ladies, miscarriages, and the occasional woman in labor. I worked in an ER. I was also becoming bitter, because there would be 7+ month pregnant women coming through the doors drunk and high on who knows what. I needed something that took me away from that and made me happy again. This is why I picked up the camera.

I was blessed to have an amazing support from women all over the country who had experienced losses such as myself. Holly was one of the first women I came in contact with. She was well know amongst the community, and luckily for me, she lived less than 2 hours away.

We had met up once or twice, and when she gave birth to her first rainbow baby, I begged her to let me take a few pictures. I needed the practice. I know, you are probably wondering what a "rainbow baby" is....well, you can find the explination here: http://journeyoflifeandluv.blogspot.com/2011/03/post-everyone-has-been-praying-for.html (about 3/4 of the way down is the definition).

She agreed, and I made my way to her to take a few photos of her daughter, Lainey, you can see those pictures here: http://journeyoflifeandluv.blogspot.com/2010/11/another-beautiful-family-shoot.html

I still LOVE these photos, but I can definitely tell I have come a LONG way!!

Well, Holly is officially expecting her second raibow baby, Evanee!! And I am soooo blessed that she chose ME for her maternity session. She is absolutely stunning, and her girsl are soooo cute!! All 4 girls were present through this shoot, including her angel Carleigh.

Holly was also VERY brave!! Not only did she want nudes, but she wanted me to post them. She claimed they were beautiful and needed to be shared:-) Of course when you are as beautiful as she is, it is easy to get great "nude" shots (as she points out, she is more covered in these shots then in a bakini!! LOL

Thank You Holly, and I cannot WAIT for Evanee's Newborn Photos!!!!

Mothers Day...and Becoming a Different Type of Mother

Sorry, once again life has taken over, and I have fallen behind on the blog posts. I still haven't written about Rosie's 2nd Birthday, but I promise I will write that post soon.

Mothers Day....

I have been a mother for 2 years now. I have celebrated Mother's Day twice so far. However, until this year, I have yet to celebrate it with a living child here on Earth. It has always been overshadowed with this heavy cloud of grief. I would stand up in church for the blessing of the mothers, and I am sure people would wonder where my child was. I would see families taking their moms out for lunch and I would try to avoid eye contact with the "new moms", because that should have been me.

This year was different. As I sat in church with Foster by my side, and Ava in my arms, I was smiling ear to ear. Ava was being her oh-so-cute self and distracting everyone around us with smiles and those big blue eyes, and I just held her and hugged her the entire time. I am so proud to have her as my daughter.

Someone was missing though.....

No matter how many Mother's Days go by, I will always remember and grieve the daughter that made me a mother for the first time....the daughter that taught me the meaning of a mother's love....my Rosalynn. She should have been there with us. I miss her EVERY day. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her, but days like Mother's Day make it that much harder.

I thank God for giving me the opportunity to practice what Rosalynn taught me. To show Avaleen every day how much she is loved and wanted. I am so blessed.

On Mother's Day, I became another kind of mother......I became a God Mother!!!

My Godson!! :-)

Foster and I stood beside Mr. JJ and JJ as baby Cole received the sacrament of Baptism!! We are both TRULY honored. Baptism is a big deal in the Catholic church, and being chosen as the God Parents is looked at as a huge responsibility. It is our job to help JJ and Mr. JJ raise Cole in the faith, to lead him and teach him the ways of the church. We are to be his spiritual role models. I will take this job very seriously! I will do everything I can to help Cole understand God's never ending love for us. I cannot thank JJ and Mr. JJ enough for choosing Foster and I:-)

It was an amazing Mother's Day!! How many people can say they became a "Mother" on Mother's Day?  I can!! A God-Mother:-)

My Baby Is BACK! :-)

Yesterday I finally broke down and called the doctor.

The problem with working in the  medical field for so long, is I tend to brush things off. I tend to second guess whether I am overreacting or not. This is one of the reasons I blame myself for Rosalynn's death. I KNEW something didn't feel right that morning, but REFUSED to go into get checked b/c I couldn't come up with a "chief complaint".

Being a mother to Avaleen, I KNOW I need to get over this "She is fine, it is not bad, I am just overreacting" and accept that the doctors are there to help...it is their job.

The doctor was able to see Ava within 2 hours of me calling....how is THAT for service?!?! So we headed in. She just seemed so miserable the three nights prior, and I just wanted to make sure there wasn't something major I was missing. There was no signs of an ear infection, but who knows...there was no fever, but then she had been on Tylenol for 3 days, so it could be covering it up.

Well, my initial instincts were right. She is fine. She is teething and just a little congested (which started the day before yesterday). The doctor said that there was a small amount of fluid behind one eardrum, but nothing to be concerned about, and there was no sign of infection. She said to switch to Motrin to help with the swelling along with the pain, and that rest and cuddles were in order.

WHEW! I can do that!! I was relieved, because the last thing I wanted to do was have to put her on antibiotics. I know they help, and there is no other way to cure ear infections, but starting antibiotics at this young of an age is just too early...I don't want her body building up resistance to antibiotics this young.

So after hanging out w/ aunt Bug, and after I returned from a photo shoot, we got home and prepared for another rough night.

Foster fed her and I gave her the Motrin. Then it was time for bed. We laid her down, and she started playing in her crib. Then she started whining and crying...but never hit that "I am in pain cry". I would peak my head in, and she would start smiling....MY BABY IS BACK. She was just trying to play her little game of "get into bed with mom and dad". Sure enough after about 10 mins of whining and light crying, she fell asleep and slept through the night again!! THANK YOU LORD! Either the Motrin worked, or that darn second tooth finally cut through making her feel sooo much better!

Glad this smile is back all the time:-) 

Ava and Her Nasty little Teeth Update

After all of the advice last night, Foster and I set out on the quest to soothe Ava and beat those nasty little teeth at their own game.

First I started out feeding her cold baby food and formula. Then Foster gave her a Bath while I attempted to get some photos edited. When she came down she seemed really happy and content. I thought for a moment that this night would go easier. NOPE. About 1 hour after her bath, right around bedtime she started crying, rubbing her eyes, screaming, and fighting us. I decided that she WAS exhausted, and WANTED to go to sleep, but these teeth, and whatever else is bothering her was preventing her from falling asleep. I gave her her nightly dose of Tylenol, 2 teething tablets and we waited to see if those would kick in. After about an hour she was still fussy, so I took Chantal's advice and put a little bit of scotch (she told me whiskey, but scotch was the only liquor we have in the house) on my finger and rubbed it on her gums...should I be worried she acted like she enjoyed the taste?!? LOL....that seemed to work for about 5 mins. So we decided to take her upstairs. Foster read to her, rocked her, and it seemed like she was going to go to sleep. She was playing in her crib but every so often moaning and whining. Well, sure enough the moaning and whining got louder and louder and more frequent. I took her out, rocked her, put an ice cube in a plastic bag and held it against her tooth (Note: I never left her alone with the plastic bag, I just didn't want the ice cube getting her and I wet). I also gave her a cold, freezer washcloth. While all of this seemed to help soothe while we were holding her, she would still scream the second we would put her down. I felt like all she wanted was to cuddle because she was in pain:-(  My poor baby girl!

The night before, if you remember from yesterday's post, she slept next to me on her belly while I patted her butt. Well, I hate sleeping in the bed with her when Foster is gone, so when he is home, it is out of the question...scares me too much. So I had an idea. I wanted to bring her bassinet back into the room. Her bassinet has a side that folds down so I can see her and reach her without getting up. Foster was TOTALLY against it.

He wanted to fight me tooth and nail. He said he was willing to stay in her nursery with her, rocking her till she fell asleep. I tried to tell him I tried that the night before with no avail. Remember, he was out of town. "We can let her cry it out," he said. Once again, I reminded him I was the only one home the two nights previous, I had tried all of this, and the ONLY thing that worked was her on her belly getting her butt patted. So he gave in.

A SOON as I placed her in the bassinet on her belly and started patting her butt, she was out! Literally, in less than 30 seconds!

Now, all night she proceeded to wake up slightly, whine, and I would pat her butt lightly and she would pass back out within seconds!! We slept (with just a few interruptions) for 8 hours!!!! Needless to say, we are ALL happier this morning. I have called the doctor to see if I can get in to get her ears checked, but if everything checks out OK, we at least know how to handle the rest of this teething!!

Oh, and don't worry...I got the 3 most amazing words leave Foster's mouth this morning..."You were right." ;-)

Nasty Little Teeth!! HELP!!!

Oh you nasty nasty teeth! What have you done with my poor sweet, content baby girl? I once had a happy baby who slept through the night, cried very little, and any crying she did was consoled by a gentle pat on the butt, or snuggles from mommy.

Now, these nasty two little teeth have changed my little princess into the "red headed step child". She has been cranky at night, and ornery during the day. No snuggles, patting, or singing works to calm her down.

The last two nights have been the worst so far. 2 nights ago she was up every 20-30 mins crying. It was 30mins sleep, 15 mins cry, 30mins sleep, 15 mins cry...over and over. About 5 am I gave up, brought her down stairs, fed her a little more and put her in the swing. For some reason, she sleeps well in the swing. Luckily, it worked...for about 2 hours. JUST enough time for me to be refreshed and ready for the day. I may try to grab a nap during her nap time, but I am soooo grateful for those 2 hours of straight sleep.

Last night was a different story. We left JJ and Mr. JJ's house and headed home. She fell asleep in the car seat, and I figured I would have a good night, and catch up on some sleep. BOY WAS I WRONG! As soon as I got thee car seat in the house, she woke up and started crying. I took her up to bed, gave her some Tylenol, some teething tablets, and patted her but. She fell back asleep and I celebrated.....WAY TOO SOON. About 15 mins later, she started crying, and crying, and screaming. It was as if someone was torturing her. I held her, rocked her, brought her into bed with me, and then decided to drive around the block. Once again, she fell asleep. Once again, just as I came in the door, she woke up screaming. I figured if I tried to feed her a little more and put her in the swing, she would sleep like she did the previous morning. NOPE. She screamed and screamed. It had been almost 2 hours of constant crying/screaming. I called David crying. I didn't know what to do. She didn't have a fever, she had been pooping, so she wasn't constipated, she was full, dry, and I had already given her the teething tablets that seemed to help during the day. I was soooo upset.

I gave her another 10 mins, and then finally picked her back up, and she started to doze. I took her into my bed....i know, i know, but at this point I was DESPERATE. She fell asleep on her belly (I know, I know!!) while I patted her butt. Finally @ 1230AM. She proceeded to wake up once and hour until 5:30 crying. I would pat her butt again, and she would go back to sleep. At 7:00 am she was WIDE awake and ready to start the day.


The first tooth popped through a few days ago, and there was momentary reprieve...about 1-2 days she slept great, and had no pain. But then the second little bugger started to come in, and my "little monster", as she has been so lovingly called by her aunt JJ since she was born, lived up to her nickname again. I just hope it breaks through quick so I can have my sweetie back:-)

I truly am hoping it is her teeth and it will stop after they have come all the way through the gums, because if it is a power struggle that can sometimes start at this age, I am in for a REAL challenge...especially if she is even half as stubborn as Foster and I are.

What do you think? Any tricks to help me out!?!?! HELP!!

My Little Sister is Getting Married!!!

 My sister, Kate, and her boyfriend, Kyle, have been dating for nearly 7 years. They met when they were freshmen in college, and although they never "officially" dated until about 4 years ago, they were what my best friend and I like to call "might-as-well-bes".

This past February Kyle finally popped the question, and I was THRILLED! Once they set a date, we waited for the weather to start getting nicer and more predictable, and set aside an afternoon for photos.

In March, I went on vacation with my husband and dad. When we were driving home, I started paying attention to my surroundings as we neared my parent's farm. My sister and Kyle had already decided they were getting married on the farm, so I figured their engagement session should have a few setting near their venue spot.

One thing about being a photographer, is you are always looking for that next "best place" to photograph clients. You pay more attention while you are a passenger, and MAN did I find some AMAZING settings!! All of them within 6-8 miles of my parents home. I wanted that personal feel to the photos, so we incorporated their pup Cleatus. He was SUCH a ham for the camera! I had sooo much fun and captured some great photos.

Also, these photos are the perfect example of why I get excited for overcast days when my clients seem disappointed. Overcast is a photographer's best friend....the colors just POP!! :-)

I also Have to give props to Katie and Kyle...it was 45 degrees and windy....and yet they make it look like it was warm and comfortable!!

I am sooo honored to be chosen as the matron of honor, and also, she had me design her invitations that came out AMAZING (I will post them after she sends them out). Here are a few photos for your viewing enjoyment:-) (I may have gone a little overboard, but I just love them all and it is hard to choose favorites! If you would like to see more of my photos, visit my blog www.irisheyesphotography.blogspot.com or "like" me on facebook www.facebook.com/irisheyesphoto .

Add caption

LOVE this one in B&W too!!!

 

All images Copyrighted by Erin Foster:: Columbus, Ohio Wedding Photographer

Vote for Avaleen!!!!

So I am going to exploit my child for a minute! lol....please go over and vote for Avaleen for cutest baby contest!! :-) She could win prizes and the chance to be on the cover of Parent Magazine. Here is the link:

http://photos.parents.com/parents-cover-contest-2012/17/2012/5939?esrc=nwphotofaves_pmcover12

I know we are behind, so we have some catching up to do in the next 4 days!! VOTE VOTE VOTE:-) lol. Thanks!!

Avaleen 6 Months!

So before I post about Rosie's Second Birthday, i thought I should probably post about my beautiful rainbow! She brings light and joy to every day, and her smiling face made the 20th so much easier. I mean come on...who couldn't smile and laugh at this little face?!?!?!

 She turned 6 months on the 13th and had her doctor's appt on the 19th. This little munchkin is a whopping 18lbs4oz of pure beef-cake...or as Foster says "Veal cake". She is measuring 27.75 inches long...and her head is in the 90th percentile...not that that surprised me...lol. Her head is big, and she is tall...but pretty lean considering her weight! We call her "Long and Lean Avabean" :-)

Right now she is sitting for long periods of time with no assistance (but always someone close by). She will stay up on her feet if holding onto something or someone is holding her. She is rolling to get to where she wants....over and over and over till she reaches whatever destination she is trying to get to.

Ava's personality is really starting to shine through. She is too smart for her own good! She "speaks up" is she is not happy about something, and HATES when she is left alone in a room.

Right now we are still struggling with sleep. She does NOT want to go to sleep at night. She fights Foster and I tooth and nail. However, when she DOES go to sleep she is sleeping 9+ hours.

We started baby food. I have canned, but like to make my own for her. It is one way I can help make sure her food is nutritious, since I haven't been able to breast feed since 6 weeks. She also tried a sippy cup for the first time and LOVED it!

Unfortunately, she has gotten to the point where she can't attend photo shoots with me. I used to be able to do a full 1.5 hour session with her hanging out in her stroller, or in the baby bjorn on my chest, but she is just getting too big, and napping a LOT less....like 2-3 20-45 minute naps a day.

2 Years, and a Heavy Heart

I woke up yesterday with a heavy heart. 2 years ago, I woke up in my bed with an overwhelming feeling that something was wrong. I didn't feel "quite right". I called my aunt and my husband, both suggested I went into urgent care. I declined, saying I had NO idea what my primary complaint would be. I worked in an ER, and if a woman came in and told me she had no idea what was wrong, I wouldn't know how to react. We would have still seen the patient, but how do you go about diagnosing the patient who has no specific complaints?!?

I had felt Rosalynn move a few times, so I wasn't worried about her. I went to lay down at about noon that day, and although I still can't tell you why, I called off work. I don't know if deep down I knew the night would take a terrible turn, maybe I was afraid of sleeping too late and then not calling off in time, I may never know what made me call off work, but I thank God I did, because I would have HATED to find out w/o Dave around that Rosie had passed.

Around 9pm I headed to Mr. and Mrs. Prince's to borrow their doppler to check for Rosie's heart beat.....nothing. We started praying that the reason was because she was breached, but when we got to the hospital, our worst fears were confirmed!

Last night I spent the evening with Ava, Cole, JJ and Mr. JJ. Foster was out of town for work. Around 7:30 PM we were walking back from dinner when a family with a two beautiful girls started walking by. The oldest girl was 18-19 months old and had the most beautiful head of red hair. She was looking at Ava and wanted to touch her and the mom said, "Be gentle Rosie, don't hurt the baby."

I immediately looked at JJ and Mr. JJ. I had chills work their way up my arms. I have yet to meet another little girl names Rosie, and for it to happen yesterday, made me feel it was OUR Rosie's way of letting us know she is still with us.

Today Foster, Ava, myself, and a few family members will be gathering to eat dinner and let off Japanese lanterns at the cemetery.

Although this year was a little easier leading up to her birthday, partially because of Miss Avaleen, but it didn't help make the actual day any easier. I miss her. I miss her every moment of every day....but these days are always the hardest.

I love you Rosalynn. Thank you for teaching me what love truly is.

The Fun Begins..Adventures in Baby Food!

We officially started on the journey of baby food about a month ago. Slowly we started introducing new flavors to Ava, and seeing how her digestive system handled the new food.

I knew from day one that I want to make my own baby food for her. However, before I got a really good blender, I had to buy a few jars. Figured, if she was like me when I was her age (I HATED baby food, and went straight to big-people food) w would not waste money on an expensive baby blender. She seemed to LOVE the baby food, so I was on the lookout for a good deal.

One morning I woke up and opened my email. There was a $150 blender on groupon for $49!! I couldn't pass it up! It has the steamer/bottle warmer/reheating plate on one side, and the blender on the other.

After a hectic week of taking photos for a wedding, set of 1 yr old twins, and my marketing gig, I FINALLY cracked open the box, and started to use my new product. I did some research on easy/good recipes for baby food for 6 month old. This is the one I found that she LOVED:

1 ripe banana and 1 avocado add water or formula or breast milk till right consistency

How easy right? I didn't even have to steam it first. Ava LOVED it!! She ate a TON of it! It even made enough for about 4 more feedings. I didn't have anything to store it in other than old breast milk bags, so I need to go out and get some ice cube trays so I can freeze the extras, and keep a variety of food so I can just thaw, reheat in my kidsline steamer side, and serve it to Miss Ava.

I am excited. I know my milk depleted after 6 weeks, and so I felt like I couldn't provide her the healthiest food. Now, with this baby food maker, I can feel like I am back in control. I can choose the foods and ingredients that go into her mouth, and make sure they are the healthiest, organic ingredients I can get!

Next up: Peas and Carrots!

Have you tried making your own baby food? How was your experience? What is your child's favorite recipe?

Marketing for a New Business

Well, I figured since I promised I would write more, and this has to do with what has been taking so much of my time up lately, I would post a little about my photography business. My small photography business has been getting more and more busy. I have been getting more and more clients, and am soooo excited! I have truly been blessed with this opportunity.

I decided if I wanted to get even more business, I needed to find some marketing opportunities. After picking my cousin's brain (she was a photographer for 10 years and does marketing for a living) and also listening to my mentor, I finally made a few connections, and jumped in.

This past weekend I had my first big marketing gig. I was nervous, excited, and hoping for the best. I was nervous because what if no one liked my stuff? I was excited at the prospect of having complete strangers take interest in my work. However,  I was a little disappointed, because I had ordered a few products that had yet to be delivered, but the table was pretty full regardless.

This particular event was a local consignment sale. Our consignment sales are HUGE! They draw new moms and experienced moms alike. Sometimes the lines will start out the door an hour before the sale actually starts. Since my main focus is newborns and children, this could potentially be a very lucrative endeavor.

These women are out to find a deal, so I figured I would offer a 15% discount for those that signed up for my drawing and did not win. The drawing was for a free photo session.

I had over 40 people sign up, and before the end of the event, I already had 3 sessions scheduled, with 2 more possibilities! I am so excited! The event has already paid for the cost to place my table. I have another consignment sale coming up next month. I am excited to see if it is as successful as this last one.

My one piece of advice, because I am by no means a marketing expert, is to have an attractive table that will draw attention and showcase your best work, and a variety of what you can offer. I had newborns, maternity, family and children photos. I left the senior, wedding, and couples shoots because that wasn't my target audience. I had large canvases, framed photos (and the frames were custom from my framer) and smaller prints under Plexiglas I placed on top of the table top. Then I had a portfolio of some of my favorite 8x10s and one of the albums I designed for one of my regular families.

Here are some pictures of my table....for my first time, I was pretty proud of it:-) Sorry for the bad pictures, they were take with my point and shoot.

Finding the Time

I have come to the conclusion that I am just going to have to bite the bullet, and FIND time to sit down and write. Sure, my photography is giving me a GREAT outlet to express my creativity, but there is still this unsatisfied ache inside of me that is only going to be satisfied by writing.

There is something new and exciting that happens every day with Ava, but sometimes I feel like I would just be boring you if I talked about them. However, then I realize I started this blog for myself, not for everyone else, and the fact that I have 150+ followers is just a bonus. So, the good, the bad, and the ugly will start popping up on this blog more often, and Ava's nap times will officially be "blog writing time".

There is SOOO much that I have left out over the past 6 months. Heck! I have only written about 10 entries since Ava entered our lives. She is rolling from back to front, and front to back. She is TRYING to sit up on her own....she can balance for a few seconds, but ultimately ends up on one side or another. She is a chatter box, and her personality is shining through.

Lately, I have started to wonder if 6 months is not too young to start manipulating her parents. Lately, when it is bed time, she has been throwing fits. Prior to a week ago, she would go down to sleep with only a few kisses, stories, and a family prayer. She would smile a squeal through the bed time stories, and then as soon as we would turn off the lights after good night kisses, she would watch her aquarium until she would drift off on her own. About a week or two ago, she has started screaming as soon as the "fun" part is done. As soon as the lights go off, the most blood cuddling screams you have heard come out of this sweet baby girl. It KILLS me. I give it about 3-5 mins before I go to soothe her. AS SOON as I pick her up, the tantrum stops, and smiles appear on her face. I know my daughter is ornery, but to be manipulative at this young of an age. I HOPE not, but the "I am getting what I want" grin that materializes the SECOND I pick her up has created doubts in my mind.

Foster has suggested allowing her to cry it out. I know at a newborn age, "crying it out" interferes with the trust/mistrust stage in their life, but if she truly is doing this to get me to pick her up, maybe I will have to try his way. Maybe if I sit by her crib and just pat her butt or rub her head so she knows I am present, but avoid picking her up, this will help the situation.

Now please, don't get me wrong, there is nothing I love more than to rock my daughter to sleep. It is the most peaceful, wonderful feeling to have my child nuzzled on my chest as I sway back and forth and she drifts off into dreamland to the soft humming of my voice. However, I have always done this for nap time, not bed time. I don't know what changed in the past 2 weeks.

I will keep you all updated on the bed time fiascoes.

As for the modeling contracts. She was approved by BOTH agencies. The NJ agency wants her info on file for direct bookings. Anything that would require a go-see would not be financially worth it to us as a family, because it doesn't even cover the cost of travel. The OH agency is ALL about her. Unfortunately, they don't get a lot of bookings for children under the age of 4...maybe 10-15 a year, but they definitely want to represent her if anything comes up. Being a local agency, we would have no issues with attending go-sees and such. I am not too disappointed in lack of opportunities, because I am so busy getting the photography business up and running, that I am afraid I wouldn't be able to give THAT much time to this endeavor.

Here are a few shots of my beautiful girl taken within the past month. She is approaching 6 months on the 13th! Boy how time flies!!!


Where did she go!?!?

LOVE this little munchkin!!

finding her feet

Meeting her new best friend COLE!!

play date w/ all the OSUE kids:-)

ready for church



Just in case you had ANY doubt in your mind that my child is ornery: