4 Month Update w/ LOTS of Pictures!!

Ava is getting SOOO big! She is growing like a weed, and her personality is coming through more and more. It has been a while since I updated, and for that I am sorry. Our family was dealing w/ my grandmother's death, traveling to visit my uncle who had open heart surgery, and now Foster's grandmother was put on Hospice, and is not expected to be with us much longer. All the while, Foster's work schedule has become more demanding, and Ava and I have be getting involved with Jazzercise, play dates with old friends, and I have been attempting to market and expand my photography.

Ava went in for her 4 month appointment on the 15th. She is 14lbs13oz, and 25 inches long! She is in the 75% for both height and weight, but the doctor said she is perfectly proportionate, so she is not the least bit worried. I am tall (5'9") and expects she will be as well.

She still has not rolled from belly to back, but that is because she is content on her belly and has fun kicking her legs. I wouldn't be surprised if she starts crawling before she rolls. She comes CLOSE to rolling from back to belly, but not quite. She is grabbing and "talking" and just getting sooo interactive. It blows me away how at this young of an age she has such a little personality. She knows what she wants, and although a content baby, if she wants something, she lets you know she wants it NOW.

Ava was blessed enough to meet her great grand mother before she goes to heaven, and I was blessed to capture some pictures of it.

Although she won't remember, I am happy we were able to get these because we can show her in the future and tell her about her great grandmother.

She also got to meet some of her 3rd cousins (I think...they are MY cousins kids). The boys LOVED hanging out with Ava, and wanted to help as much as possible!

I got to spend some quality time with my cousin "Pixel" who is also a photographer and we talked photography, and made arrangements to attend two really exciting events in the next couple of months.

Ava got her first taste of rice cereal at 4 months, and it was really cute!

YUMMM!!

I think she liked the taste of the bib more than the cereal! lol

And of COURSE i have taken TONS of pictures of her!

sleeping on daddy

playing w/ the turtle while mommy makes lunch

exhausted from a whole day of playing!

getting ready for church at Notre Dame

And as if that wasn't enough pictures, this is what I have been up to lately: you can see more by following my photography blog at www.irisheyesphotography.blogspot.com

Look at his little face as his mom kisses him!!! LOVE it!

LOVE the reflection photo!!

sweet smushy face!

LOVE!! beautiful family!!

Donating Breast Milk

This is a very personal post/question for my fellow Baby Loss Mothers. After losing Rosalynn, one of the hardest parts was when my milk came in. Not only were my arms aching for the baby that was supposed to come home with me, but now my body was as well. However, recently a question was asked by one of my favorite PP nurses. My story had inspired her, and she wanted my personal opinion on a sensitive subject. Would I have donated my milk to the NICU if given the option after losing Rosie?

This question was a hard one to ask. Right now, 22 months later, I say yes, I would have done it. I would have done anything to validate my daughter's death. However, thinking back to those first few days, how would I have reacted if someone asked me 1-2 days after losing her to donate my milk?

Foster had brought up the idea of donating Rosie's cord blood, but unfortunately, by the time the c-section happened. it was too late, the blood was clotted, and not appropriate for donation. He was all about doing something to help other babies. If HE had thought about the idea of milk donation and talked to me about it, I may have considered it. If a nurse of doctor had brought it up? I may have gotten offended. "You want me to help another baby when I can't take home my own!?!?"

Maybe an information pamphlet? Maybe if the home health nurse who did my follow up 3 days after I got home would have been the person appropriate to bring up the subject? What do you think? how would you have reacted if asked in the hospital, and if that was the inappropriate time to breech the subject, when, how, and where would it be appropriate?

Fun Photography Blog

Since I like to keep different aspects of my life seperate, I RARELY post on this blog my photography sessions. Although this is more of an "all around" blog, and not JUST focused on Baby loss, lets admit, Rosie DID inspire me to start it, and there are TONS of Baby loss and infertile women who follow me. Most of my photography is based around children and newborns. I don't want to have anyone click on my blog and gringe because they see a sleeping baby or a plump 6 month old. However, without losing Rosalynn, I would never be doing this. I needed an outlet for my grief, and photography had always been a hobby. She encouraged me to live every day as if it was my last. So I quit my day job when Ava was born to pursue building my business full time.

So far it is going amazing! A little random...some weeks I will have 2-3 shoots, and then others none, but it is such a fulfilling jo, and I know with time I will start getting a regular flow of clients. I was doing a 6 month old's shoot last night and was telling his parents/good friends of mine that I feel guilty having people pay, because I feel like I am having too much fun! But alas, in order for me to keep doing this, I have to charge. There are alot of expenses:-)

I have a seperate blog for my photography. It is not all focused on the sessions, but instead have special posts of before and after photos using photoshop, pull back shots of newborn sessions, and even a "how far I have come since my first session" post. I answer questions I have always wondered about photography...like HOW do photogs find the most amazing houses w/ great wallpaper, hardwood floors, and perfect lighting to take newborn photos in? Or HOW does a photog get the "hand and baby floating look on a black background?"

Check it out, and please follow if you are interested. www.irisheyesphotography.blogspot.com

Roses From Rosalynn and Project Sweet Peas Fundraiser

For those of you who are friends with me on facebook will be driven nuts over the next few weeks by this announcement:-)

For those of you who are NOT friends with me on facebook, first; shame on you, and second; this is for you!

Roses from Rosalynn is the project I started in memory of my daughter. the non-profit project is a "daughter" project, or local project to Project Sweet Peas which is the international organization. A few times a year we have big group fundraisers. This time we chose to do a t-shirt sale.

This is where BOTH of my loves, Roses from Rosalynn  and my photography came together. They needed a picture to put on the front of the shirt. It needed to show the love that a parent has for a child without having a specific person on it. We wanted it to be personal. I submitted a photo I took during a newborn session with a friend of mine and her son who also spent 6 days in the NICU, like Ava. The picture was more than just a symbol of parental love, it was also personal because it was of a family that had suffered and persevered through the roller coaster that is the NICU.

Well, my photo was chosen, and God willing, will be worn all across the nation as a way of promoting awareness of stillbirth and NICU struggles.

We have shirts for both NICU and Angel parents. They are not that expensive, and even if you haven't lived through a loss or a stay in the NICU, you can still purchase a shirt that says "I Support Project Sweet Peas" and support this great organization. Also, to you NICU nurses, there are shirts that say "I am a NICU nurse" or "I Save Sweet Peas" that are PERFECT for you!!! There will be a spot on the form that asks what project you are supporting. If you don't mind, please specify Roses from Rosalynn, because I will get credit towards my project.

 http://projectsweetpeas.com/2012Tshirts.aspx

Thank you all in advance. please feel free to message me if you have any questions. Also, IF there is enough interest, we will be making child sized ones and onsies, so PLEASE let me know if you would be interested in buying one in those sizes, and I will get back to you if we have enough interest to produce them!